After a weekend of being very busy. I was happy to be home again. I missed Jack as did Maddie and my bed. I unpacked and got everything back in order and hung with my family, it was nice. I had to get up pretty early today to head to Putnam to meet with the radiologist. It was a follow up "how's it going" meeting and to do my mapping. It took almost two hours. When they where all done they tattooed me. Three little dots, but they are permanent. I will have these dots for the rest of my life... They kind of hurt right now, maybe it is me, maybe it is in my head. I really did not want to have to do radiation. I know everyone keeps telling me it is the easy part. It just does not appeal to me at all. Trust me, I didnt want to do any of it. When someone asks Jeff an off beat question about me or my cancer he usually responds "It's not fun and I would not recommend it to anyone". It's so true. This whole process sucks. This weekend everyone made a point to tell me how good I looked. Come on honestly who is going to walk up to a cancer patient and say, wow you look awful, hows it going? I took my compliments but with a grain of salt.
I have been asked a lot of dumb thing during this process and today was no exception. The tech who was doing my mapping, asked if we planned to have more children. Now, I know this sounds like a normal question. However, after having trouble getting pregnant to start, I would never ask ANYONE that question. I will not ask Lauren and Scott, now that they are married when they plan to have a family. What if they plan to right away and have an issue, that just causes more stress for them. Sorry to get off the path. I just said we would like to but who knows. Yes we did a fertility cycle and froze four embryo's. We have no clue what damage the chemo and radiation will have on my reproductive system or if I will even get my period back. This whole menopause thing is crazy. The hot flashes are crazy. So barring any thing wacky I will begin my zapping on Sept 6th and end it on or around 10/20. I am really looking forward to the end. If there is a positive to this radiation thing, I will not have to worry about my immune system as much. So I can get my teeth cleaned (which I can not wait for the feel slimy, for those who know me I fear the dentist, who cares if she is a great friend). I can not wait to get my eyes checked. I also can not wait to get back to the gym. I found out today I get a free three month membership to Allsport for going to radiation. I see it as a perk!!!
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