I only have 4 more after this. Four seem like such a more manageable number doesn't it? It funny because on Monday I was feeling beaten down. I felt like this has just been dragging. Yesterday was a turning point for me. Maybe it is because we (dr F and I) actually talked about my surgery. Which for me is the end point. I am full aware that I will have to be monitored and tested frequently for the next few years and well for the rest of my life. However I can see the light now. My friend Christina pointed that out to me after yesterday's post. I think part of it was something Jeff pointed out to me. When I feel "done" he likes to remind me all I have done this year. A fertility cycle, a mastectomy, a third surgery for my port and 11 chemo treatments, endless blood tests, 4 neulasta injections, and a lot of neupogen injections (I have lost count). I sometimes forget to turn around and look back to see all that I have been through. So I am seeing light!!!
Dr R is in today. After an hour and a half wait to just get the ok for today I was a little frustrated. He must have picked up on it because when the neupogen subject came up. I clearly asked if I needed it. He asked why and I just plainly stated that I do not find them fun. Our game plan is to now do a CBC On Monday and go from there!!!! I also tried on a dress of Aunt Carols for the wedding it looks nice on me I will need to either do a ton of ab work in the next few weeks or look into spanks. If I am not feeling too foggy after this we will take the other two dresses back. I also noticed the leather on the heel of my new shoe is not attached so I plan to exchange them too. I hope the have another 5.5.
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